I know it can always be worse...

I just feel the need to write today...maybe to feel sorry for myself for just a minute. The last two days, Ryan has told me that he was having trouble closing his left eye. So, like any mom, I looked at it and didn't see anything unusual. Tuesday night, the boys were sitting around the dining room table playing Monopoly and I noticed that when Ryan smiled, only half of his mouth 'smiled'...when he crinkled his nose, only one nostril 'crinkled'...when he blinked, he was definately having trouble closing his eye. I jumped on the internet to look up Bell's Palsey. I made an appointment for the doctor for Wednesday and he confirmed that it was what I suspected. Why does this have to happed to us? I understand that this is most likely a temporary condition, temporary meaning this could last a few weeks or a year or two. WHY does my baby have to deal with this? He is loaded up on Prednisone, has to have drops put in his eyes every 2 hours, and he has to wear an eye patch all day and night for at least a few weeks. I just feel like crying. In fact, I did last night after they all went to sleep. I went in to check on the boys and there was Ryan, sleeping peacefully with the big patch on his face.

I do realize that things can alwasy be worse....thank God this is all we have to deal with but it is still frightening and he is still my baby!! I wish it were me...he was so upset to go to school today. He was afraid that the kids were going to make fun of him. He was afraid because he knows that the school nurse was going to have to give him his drops. I wish I could be there to do it for him...

I just needed to vent...I love my kids and it make me sad and angry when my little guys have to go thru anything like this....but it could always be worse.....

xoxoxoxxo

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KEVIN!!

It's hard to believe that another year has passed and my babies are getting older. Kevin just celebrated his 11th birthday...11!!!! Where does the time go? Trying to get Kevin to sit still for pictures is like trying to nail jello to a tree!! So, here a just pictures of his day!!

"To Celebrate Growing Old"

A friend sent me this in an email today. It was written by a woman who had just turned 90 years of age! These are what she considers to be the most important lessons life has to teach us...go ahead and read. I guarantee you will see yourself in almost every one!

Life isn't fair, but it's still good....
When in doubt, just take the next small step.
Life is too short to wast time hating anyone.
Your job won't take cuare of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will.
Pay off your credit cards every month.
You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
It's OK to let your children see you cry.
Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
Everything can change in th blink of any eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you.
When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special
occasion. Today is special.
Over prepare, then go with the flow.
Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
No one is incharge of your happiness but you.
Alwasy choose life.
Forgive everyone everything.
What other people think of you is none of your business.
Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
However good or bad a situation is, it will chage.
Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
Believe in miracles.
God loves you because of who God is. not because of anything you did or didn't do.
Don't audit life. Show up and mke the most of it now.
Growing old beats the alternative---dying young.
Your children get only one childhood.
All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
The best is yet to come.
No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
Yield
Life isn't tied in a bow, but it's still a gift.

9/11...We Will Never Forget

It's hard to imagine that 8 years ago today, our world would be forever changed. So many things have changed since then and yet so many things have stayed the same. I can remember the absolute horror when we put the television on that fateful morning. My brother had called from Florida and asked us if we were watching.....I can't help but feel a bit helpless this morning. It's a day that we know will come around once a year and yet, it never gets any easier. I watched the news this morning and was reminded of the sobering realization that this will happen again...it is just a matter of time. I fear for myself, my children, my family and all Americans. My heart just breaks knowing there are families waking up this morning and re-living the deaths of their loved ones...I on the other hand was able to hold my babies and kiss them good morning. My heart breaks knowing that there are so many people hurting this morning...hell, everyday, over the loss that they have experienced. I don't even know how to put my own feelings into words. May God bless us all and especially those who lost so much on that day ...and for those who continue to give their lives for our country. We will never forget 9/11...it will be forever etched in our memories and our hearts....

Backpacks packed....check, Lunches made...check, School bus tires screeching 'round the corner....PRICELESS!!!!!

So, it's Wednesday, Sept 9th and it is the first day of school. My baby is now going to middle school!! His bus was scheduled for 7:12 a.m. but the school requested that he be at the bus stop by 7 a.m. to account for the new busing schedule. I told him that I would wait with him at the stop until the bus acutally arrived....but....NNNNOOOOOO! That was never going to happen...."But Nicholas" I said...."Just let me sit in the car across the street so that I know you got on safely" and again, I got a huge NNNNOOOOOO! With my sad look on my face, he relented and said "OK...as long as you don't look at me or wave goodbye to me"...."Deal" I said...and so, I sat down the block in my car wathching my 'baby' get on the bus for Middle School...where has the time gone? It feels like yesterday when we were walking him into pre-school with his little dinasour name tag that said "MY NAME IS NICHOLAS"....God do I feel old :( .........then it was time for the elementary school bus. This bus comes at a more decent hour of 8:50 a.m. I went to work a little late so that I could send my boys off with a warm mommy wave....and a small jig in the middle of the street...ha ha ha!!! Kevin is going into 6th grade and will be the kids who "rule the school" as I am told! John and Ryan are going into fourth grade. Needless to say, they were all very excited about today....Hope it's a great year boys!!