I know it can always be worse...

I just feel the need to write today...maybe to feel sorry for myself for just a minute. The last two days, Ryan has told me that he was having trouble closing his left eye. So, like any mom, I looked at it and didn't see anything unusual. Tuesday night, the boys were sitting around the dining room table playing Monopoly and I noticed that when Ryan smiled, only half of his mouth 'smiled'...when he crinkled his nose, only one nostril 'crinkled'...when he blinked, he was definately having trouble closing his eye. I jumped on the internet to look up Bell's Palsey. I made an appointment for the doctor for Wednesday and he confirmed that it was what I suspected. Why does this have to happed to us? I understand that this is most likely a temporary condition, temporary meaning this could last a few weeks or a year or two. WHY does my baby have to deal with this? He is loaded up on Prednisone, has to have drops put in his eyes every 2 hours, and he has to wear an eye patch all day and night for at least a few weeks. I just feel like crying. In fact, I did last night after they all went to sleep. I went in to check on the boys and there was Ryan, sleeping peacefully with the big patch on his face.

I do realize that things can alwasy be worse....thank God this is all we have to deal with but it is still frightening and he is still my baby!! I wish it were me...he was so upset to go to school today. He was afraid that the kids were going to make fun of him. He was afraid because he knows that the school nurse was going to have to give him his drops. I wish I could be there to do it for him...

I just needed to vent...I love my kids and it make me sad and angry when my little guys have to go thru anything like this....but it could always be worse.....

xoxoxoxxo